Outcast

Outcast
Maryam Alatmane

 

I was a loner, hanging out in the midst of the cool crowd
I didn’t belong; I was an outcast

I walked past the girls
In their bubble-gum pink
Who whispered too loudly
About my clothes from the trash can

I was a loner, hanging out in the midst of the cool crowd
I didn’t belong; I was an outcast

The way they smiled at me
All dazzling white teeth and no meaning
The way they shot me sympathetic looks
But looks can be deceiving

I was a loner, hanging out in the midst of the cool crowd
I didn’t belong; I was an outcast

I was subtly ignored
As I tried to talk to them
Left there; broken
Listening to the sound of their shrill laughter
Perfect; in unison
To their mocking cries of
‘Did you hear anything? No? Me neither.’

 I was a loner, hanging out in the midst of the cool crowd
I didn’t belong; I was an outcast

I sit in my seat
Trying to ignore their whispers
The teacher’s back is turned
I’m in no-man’s land
Mercilessly
Poking me, prodding me

An aeroplane crash-lands in the back of my head

I was a loner, hanging out in the midst of the cool crowd
I didn’t belong; I was an outcast

I walk through the corridor
Head bowed; eyes haunted
Suddenly
I’m falling
My books fan out across the floor
I look up
‘Sor-ry!’ she says, and laughs

The tears flow down my cheeks
Wiping them away furiously
I pick up my books
Stuff them in my bag
I stumble to my feet; I am on uncharted territory
But I walk away anyway
Head held high

 

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