Outcast
Maryam Alatmane
I was a loner, hanging out in the midst of the cool crowd
I didn’t belong; I was an outcast
I walked past the girls
In their bubble-gum pink
Who whispered too loudly
About my clothes from the trash can
I was a loner, hanging out in the midst of the cool crowd
I didn’t belong; I was an outcast
The way they smiled at me
All dazzling white teeth and no meaning
The way they shot me sympathetic looks
But looks can be deceiving
I was a loner, hanging out in the midst of the cool crowd
I didn’t belong; I was an outcast
I was subtly ignored
As I tried to talk to them
Left there; broken
Listening to the sound of their shrill laughter
Perfect; in unison
To their mocking cries of
‘Did you hear anything? No? Me neither.’
I was a loner, hanging out in the midst of the cool crowd
I didn’t belong; I was an outcast
I sit in my seat
Trying to ignore their whispers
The teacher’s back is turned
I’m in no-man’s land
Mercilessly
Poking me, prodding me
An aeroplane crash-lands in the back of my head
I was a loner, hanging out in the midst of the cool crowd
I didn’t belong; I was an outcast
I walk through the corridor
Head bowed; eyes haunted
Suddenly
I’m falling
My books fan out across the floor
I look up
‘Sor-ry!’ she says, and laughs
The tears flow down my cheeks
Wiping them away furiously
I pick up my books
Stuff them in my bag
I stumble to my feet; I am on uncharted territory
But I walk away anyway
Head held high