I Stare
Beth Collins
(Coventry)
I stare,
At the everlasting fields that are my dreams
I stare ,
As my mother disappears over the horizon, uncaring.
I stare,
As my father follows her, desperately calling
I stare,
as the world speeds forward and leaves me in the dust
I stare,
at my children as the grow older. Playing, laughing, crying.
I stare,
as they come to me with problems, problems i can’t solve,
I stare,
at my childs grave, a life he took himself
I stare ,
ahead, forever silent, wondering what has become of me, creating a world in which I don’t exist.
I stare,
and wonder what it would like to live, although I’m not dead.
I stare,
at the world I have erased, and think, ‘why me?’
I stare,
As I finally open up my eyes, although they were never closed,
I no longer stare,
But say, think and do, because although I can’t get my life back, I can make the most of what I have left.